This is a phenomenon which you may be lucky enough to experience in your life. When it happened to me I realised that this felt like a very different but more intense love for a child than I had ever experienced before, even surpassing the love of my own children, who it must be said I adore beyond belief, warts and all as they say.
Why the intensity? Why so different?
Well, I guess after many months of reflection, it probably boils down to one thing, immortality.
As a leader and in the maelstrom of life with all it’s high and low points I was always intent on the now. How is my career progressing? How are the relationships and love that I value progressing? Does my partner still love me? Do my children love me? Am I earning enough to live the lifestyle that I want for all of us? Am I keeping us all safe and secure?
These things embroiled me in the day to day, often not allowing me to always consider not just tomorrow but also when I am gone. I am much better at not doing that now. I suppose that the ultimate icon of all I have achieved is embodied in my grandchild and the grandchildren who are still to come. I may never meet them or those that I do I may never see them finally grow up and form lifelong partners and have their own children. That is irrelevant, I know deep in my heart they will be there.
If only we could capture that during our lives and give ourselves the opportunity to step back from the fray of life sometimes and recognise the beauty of this life and all it has to offer.
The poem is my message to my grandchildren both now and in the future. Stand back and capture the moments you are given and create, because they will never be repeated.

The Tale of the Garrilygar

The garrilygump is a very big fish who lives at the bottom of the sea
He has great big eyes and a great big mouth
And he eats all his friends for tea
The garrilygar and the garrilygee love the garrilygump for free
But hide in the rocks and the caves everyday
So they don’t get eaten for tea
The garrilygar and the garrilygee are not such big fishes as he
They have smaller eyes and smaller mouths
And they eat all their friends for tea
And the garrilybish and the garrilygosh are very small fish indeed
Who live at the bottom of the sea
They have tiny eyes and tiny mouths
And all their friends eat them for tea
So they hide in the rocks and the little caves every day
Always at quarter to three
So always beware little fish ee dee dee
the garrilygump, the garrilygar and the garrilygee,
If you are a little fish and live at the bottom of the sea
For they’ll be out and about everyday
looking for little fishes like you
As a snack for their afternoon tea.

For my grand-daughter Ava O’Brien 4 and half months old
Tod O’Brien March 2013